Friday, June 02, 2006

Sigh

I'm getting more bored as time passes. Coupled with tired and you have all but immobile. Nothing whatever on the job front either, which is encouraging.

Part of the problem is that I'm so damned lonely it hurts. I don't have any friends any more who live within visiting distance. I don't go anywhere or do anything other than stay home, read, write, and do a few chores here and there. The highlight of my day today, for instance, was going to the store and buying fertilizer for my garden.

I would love to have someone to talk to, share ideas with, and maybe go to a movie or out to dinner with from time to time. I'm not talking romance here, just another human being's voice for a few hours once a week or so. Susan is too busy with her girlfriend and her drinking and stuff. And I do try hard to stay out of the way.

Things would be so much easier if I even had a penpal. Something to look forward to each day. As it is, the first thing I think of when I wake up is how many hours until bedtime. Days are to be gotten through not enjoyed for me any more. I've looked for penpal sites, but the only one that seemed half promising turned out to be populated with cretins.

Anyway, once I get retired in Dec. and have health insurance, I'll go in and see if they can do anything whatever to help me sleep. Perhaps sleeping even one or two nights a week would give me more energy and more enthusiasm. I have zip of either at the moment and it's really depressing.