Time

Time is a funny thing. For me it's getting to be a problem. I don't seem to have the time and energy to do all the things I need to get done in a day. I want to do so much that I seem to get mired down and as a result, while some things inevitably get done, it's never enough. I need a way to get organized and get things moving forward.

Part of my problem is that I'm scattered by nature unless it's work-related. I have a short attention span, and always have many projects, even many books, going all at the same time. By jumping from one thing to the next I sometimes get things finished eventually. I was thinking about this today. I realize that part of my problem is sheer exhaustion from years of chronic insomnia. But to me that somehow seems like a partial cop-out.

The solution eludes me. I know it's not trying to concentrate exclusively on one thing until it's finished. I'd never do it. But I need some incentive/motivation to make things happen.

So what are these things? Well, first and foremost is getting a job. I am working hard on this but getting nowhere fast. Interviews but no job. Given my field, my age is against me, so that is the second thing. I need to figure out ways of expanding a really good pool of skills and knowledge into more directions. The pay doesn't have to be so good at this point as I retire in a year and a half anyway. Just about enough time to get a filler in place and producing cash by the time I'm out of the conventional workforce for good.

The next is writing. I need to get a handle on finishing my book. I'm trying something new, so we'll see if it works and gives me the tools to actually finish. Writing in general comes into this. Can I find enough things at which I'm relatively expert so that I can make money from it? I know a lot about a lot of things. I need to figure out how to capitalize on that.

I need time for personal stuff, like my crafts, pleasure and information and professional reading, this blog, and getting CLUEs to work. This is a lot of to-do stuff. A lot more want to do stuff. I'm not sure where to go. I'm doing some heavy reading on freelancing, and also exploring web portal sites thinking to branch out to teaching in online Universities, and other such areas where my considerable talents would be put to good use.

Sometimes it seems to me as if I'm spinning my wheels and making no real progress. I really need a job. I have an interview next week for what would be a dream way to go out of the workforce in style in 2-3 years. I'd get to go at the top of my game. Wish I had any faith that something good will pan out. It's been almost three months since I've had a job. I really need to get back into it and be productive again.

Notice I've not even mentioned the notion of having a personal life or actually doing things just for the fun of doing them. Other than playing an online game, I have no personal life. I seldom go anywhere and don't have a single friend in this area any more. I don't even have any interest in actually changing that. I guess being self-sufficient does have its up side.